So I am going to give my accounts of things that happen to me on a somewhat daily basis that I find humorous and entertaining. I'll start with a re-cap of 2 scenarios...
Scenario#1
I take the train to work about 2x a week, now that I am in school I mostly take the bus. I love the opportunity to read on the train...I actually really look forward to it because I can't read on the bus without getting motion sickness. I boarded the train with Anthony Bourdain's Nasty Bits in hand and sat in a 3 seater in the aisle seat next to a gentleman maybe a few years older than me. I dug into my book as the train was pulling away...
About 2 minutes into the train ride I notice the fella next to me looking my way. OK fine I totally do this and am an offender if its a magazine or something with photos or text that I can actually read from afar but a BOOK with only text which is so tiny to begin with... He was literally almost on my shoulder reading along with me, page after page. I even tried to angle the book a certain way so he couldn't get a clear view... didn't work. I kept stopping and closing the book then re-starting hoping he would get the hint. He started right where I left off. He kept this up the WHOLE train ride. I guess I should have asked him if he wanted to borrow it for the remainder or the trip.
Lesson: In the Caroline Perry book of rules to live by you are allowed to glance at a magazine and/or newspaper over someones shoulder without being obvious or disturbing the reader. If you get caught-STOP. You are NOT allowed to read a book over someones shoulder no ifs ands or buts.
Scenario #2
I called out sick yesterday to go to a doctor's appointment and have a day of mental relaxtion and rest. While on my way back from the doctor's I thought I would stop in Kohl's real quick to see if they had a few things I had been looking for. As I pull into the parking lot I notice the place is packed... like christmas shopping packed. Do that many people not work these days and still have money to shop? If you know the secret to not working and still pulling in some income let me know.
So I am driving around looking for a spot with I notice one up front next to the handicapped spots. I start to pull in then realize there is a sign in front of the spot that says "reserved for superstar of the month." REALLY? come on now. To top things off there were not one but TWO spots with this sign. This raised a few questions/observations:
- What does it mean? Is that like employee of the month?
- Does the supserstar get a superstar parking permit?
- How do they(kohl's or the cops) enforce this?
- What would one say if I argued about being the superstar...because I know I totally am.
- If I was Kohls' employee of the month I would want something a little better than a close parking spot...try financial incentive, that seems to work alot better.
I almost parked there just for shits and giggles... I wish I had taken a picture of this assanine sign with my camera. Note to self: gotta remember that for future posts.
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your kohl's experience raising a very interesting point. how would said cops/kohl's security enforce the "superstar parking only"?
ReplyDeletei think you have to go back there and stick it to the Man by parking in that spot until it causes a ruckus. it would turn our legal system on its head.
do you think they would take you to court? the burden of proof is on them to prove that you AREN'T a superstar. no easy task considering that you are a mega-superstar.
damn the Man. save the Empire.